


Congratulations

by quadmika



Category: Ensemble Stars! (Video Game)
Genre: Character Study, Everything Hurts, F/M, Heartbreak, Jealousy, M/M, Missed Chance, Pining, this is rly short and also not my usual writing style
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-31
Updated: 2019-03-31
Packaged: 2019-12-27 03:14:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 605
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18295697
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/quadmika/pseuds/quadmika
Summary: Shu left for France, and he left alone.





	Congratulations

It was what Shu wanted. 

Mika's happiness, his freedom, his own independence. 

To never hurt him again, to disappear from his sight and leave everything as a fond memory. 

To lock his complicated feelings away, with the rest of his repressed thoughts and emotions. 

What would make these any different? 

Leaving the country to go abroad isn't exactly the usual thing someone would do to run away from their feelings, but Shu Itsuki had always been just the way he is. Dramatic and... lonely.

So, so lonely. 

Still, he ignores any phone calls from the boy he had grown to adore. Would he ever admit that to himself, as he declines contact for the thousandth time? 

He still can't manage to draw himself from Mika for long. Checking on him almost constantly on all his social media accounts, being overly cautious not to like anything on accident. 

He couldn't come back from that. 

This time is no different. With a bored expression he's scrolling through Mika's Twitter when one of the newest posts he retested catches his eye. A photoset of selfies of Mika, with his usual snaggletoothed grin that always made Shu's heart ache. 

Arashi was right next to him, their cheeks pressed together with the most dazzling smile on her face. Her hair had gotten longer, Shu notes in the back of his mind. Maybe she would like some accessories...? Mika would smile for sure if he made her some. 

The picture was covered in LINE stickers, with hearts and cute ribbons and a singular emoji of a character that looked more cursed than cute in the corner. If it was a collaboration, he could definitely tell. He can't help but give a low chuckle at Mika's little addition. 

He swipes to the next photo, and with that his smile quickly fades. Another selfie, this one probably this most "inappropriate" picture of Mika that exists. He's covering most of his face to hide the blush visible even in the photo, where Arashi is pressed close against him with their lips connected in a gentle and innocent kiss; one of pure affection. 

Shu feels his mouth run dry, reading the caption over and over. 

"Hi guys~! Might as well just say it, the rumours about our relationship is true!!! Yep yep~~~ Mika-chan is my boyfriend!!!!" followed by a string of emojis.

Shu grits his teeth, gripping the phone harder than he means to. His mouth draws into a frown, his face scrunching up into an image of himself that frustrates him. 

Crying wasn't beautiful. 

He... was no longer beautiful.

Was he ever? With such a selfish attitude, that took Mika for granted?

He was a fool. So ignorant for so long, such a selfish and stubborn excuse of a man.

He let the one person he had loved run right through his fingers. His adoration, his love, his lovestruck wonder... 

It belonged to her now. 

Because Shu Itsuki is a fool. An embarrassment of a lover.

Because he let the man he loves go.

Everything he could have done clouds his mind. He should have stayed. He should have listened. He should have spoke up and said he loves him. He should have kissed him.

But he could never swallow his pride. His fear. His confusion of how to communicate.

His fear of love and being loved. 

Yes, Shu has lost.

And as always, he was so, so lonely.

Gripping the phone still, his knuckles on the verge of turning white. He closes his eyes, just for a moment, before typing the first message to Mika since he left Japan in the replies.

"Congratulations."

**Author's Note:**

> idk what to say except god hates me


End file.
